Creating Home


Have you spent time putting ideas on paper of how you want things to go at home? Chores you’d like the kids to do, a rotation of cleaning or cooking responsibilities or even figured out when you’ll study and rest?

Sometimes this time can feel misspent if you get your master plan mapped out and then something crazy throws life way off balance! Like say, breaking a bone or having surgery or remodeling a house or moving…the list of potential plan-disruptive events is long.

But was your planning time really wasted? What happens when you are out of commission? Hopefully you will have help with things you temporarily can’t do and your general plan can serve as a guide to helpers. What happens when you get through the move? Voila! You can post your plan and get to work maintaining your new place.

Surely getting through the disruptions, the waiting until things are back to manageable, takes a lot of patience. You have to hold on to the vision of your kind of “normal” until you can live it again.

And if things change so much that your original plan doesn’t fit anymore, you can go back to the drawing board and craft one that does. Only now you’ll have the experience of thinking through things and writing your thoughts out.

Kids thrive on knowing what comes next. Routine and order can serve as a security blanket. The fact that regular life has so many twists and turns just means that we work for days of pattern and predictability, sprinkled with times of spontaneity and fun, while learning agility and practicing patience when we experience windows of waiting.

I wish you all the best!!



Work On It


Some years ago I read a couple of books by Michael Gerber on business building.

I was very intrigued and especially enjoyed the audio version of The E Myth that Gerber read for the recording.

One thing that he emphasized over and over again is that entrepreneurs need to work on their business not just in their business.

In other words, you can write or coach or bake or paint or whatever it is that you produce or provide to your people, but that is only a small piece of being in business. The other parts are what you do when you work on your business, or what it takes to design the systems, policies and procedures, structures, to find people to hire, etc.

It’s the same at home.

You can spend all day every day cleaning and cooking and organizing, but the household really starts to hum when you have spent some time putting systems into place that support you in knowing what you need to clean, organize and cook, who is going to do it and when and how it will happen.

When you have a system under you, you know where to start, how to share the load with the rest of the family and much of the stress of putting out day-to-day fires calms down.

I hope you are well today. I hope you are spending time creating your system, so that you can maintain your home while boosting your health! We must learn to scale back the stress! I’m working on it. Hope you are too.



P.S. Are you ready for some help with systems? I’d be happy to walk through it with you. Just reply to this post or drop me a message!

Flesh and Blood and Beauty


Ever notice the simple truth that men and women are very, very different?

Isn’t it funny that that’s a no-brainer question and you might think I’m being funny, but in society’s quest for reaching some kind of realm where we are all the same, sometimes this blatant fact gets over looked or kicked under the proverbial rug.

We are different. We are vastly different and we need to be in order to make the whole that our two halves make.

So to point out a few things about women that we get stuck on if we are trying to be like men:

We are softer. We have different hormones that make us that way. Yes, there are the few sculpted, young, tanned and toned female bodies that are posted everywhere we look so that we can compare ourselves and come up short, and somehow think that we are flawed and need to hide. But those bodies don’t look like anyone I know. And I have beautiful friends! They just don’t look like they’ve been through body-building boot camp. They look like women who are healthy and active but not with buns or anything of steel. {Can I say that?}

We are more susceptible to the effects of stress. Nope, we aren’t robots, nor are we like the “women” in movies who carry machine guns while wearing seductive red leather…whatevers. You know who I mean? The newish heroines who are as tough and crass as the men but still have to be sexually alluring? {What is that about?} We don’t zoom here and there and hire and fire people with no emotion and order the world around or go through separation and loneliness without visible, sometimes crushing effects. Our hormonal balance tips when we get over-done. It lets our bodies know that it’s not a good time to conceive, since there’s already so much commotion going on we might not be able to carry and nurture another life.

We need the care and nurture of other women. Our mothers and sisters and daughters and friends are very important to our health! We need connections and talking and support and friendship in order to be well. We also need breaks! We multi-task like nobody’s business and then need to disengage from the intensity and have a good laugh or sometimes a good cry and oftentimes both!

So my friends, particularly my young friends, if you are feeling that you need to be going at break-neck speed to have the body of Hollywood’s dreams, or fame or recognition or all of the accomplishments that you want, right now, please know that your speed will eventually be more hurtful than helpful. Cortisol {that notorious stress hormone} thrives on you thinking that you need have it and be it all now! It will keep you from losing that weight. It will keep your hormones in disarray. It will age you and depress you and leave your husband wondering what has happened to the wonderful girl he married.

Our nurturing nature requires us to be present in order to be effective. That means that when we are relaxed and enjoying ourselves we are far more nurturing than when we are uptight and thinking about something else! {Sigh. I so wish I could snap myself back in time to try again knowing that is the goal instead of trying to find validation in doing too much!} I hope you can benefit from knowing that you were designed to foster connections and that you will be far more effective when you do what it takes to pamper yourself and calm yourself and create in yourself a warm and sunny place that will renew you and keep you fresh as much as possible.

Be well. It’s pretty important to those you love.







Thought Training


Hello! I hope you’ve had a good day thus far.

I’d like to ask you, as of right now, how many declarations do you have in your view around your house? And how are they posted? Did you use a dry erase marker on your mirror? Or sticky notes stuck on light switches or doors? How about a page of them hanging next to your bed? Or are they written across the pages of your planner?

Wherever they are and however they are written, I hope they exist! There is just too much negativity coming at you every day to not have some counterbalance! So, if at this point you don’t have anything posted that is going to feed your positive mindset, please, I challenge you, get some written and posted today.

Don’t know where to begin in crafting a few supportive declarations? All you have to do is think about what is challenging you most right now! Is it a health challenge or physical pain? Is it a relationship or a schedule or a particular job you dislike? Whatever you are thinking about negatively is exactly what you want to turn around in your thinking.

If I am feeling challenged when trying to learn something new, I might say, “I am open to learning every day!” or “I am a great student and I learn quickly and well!”

What if I am struggling with a person or a relationship? I might craft a declaration like, “I love _____ and they love me.” or “I am a thoughtful friend, (or wife or mother or sister…)”

Learning to shift our mental conversation from gloom and despair to a positive, proactive one, we can make amazing strides in overcoming the difficulties that are uniquely ours.

Sending you much love and kudos for all the ways that you are being kind to yourself and others. You are a blessing!


P.S. If you ever feel that you need professional help to get through an issue that is dogging you, please don’t hesitate to ask for it! It is our job to ask for help when we need it and it doesn’t mean that we have failed. It means that sometimes things are so close to us that we can’t see them how they are and we need perspective. I am so grateful for the inspired counselors that have helped me along my way!