Marriage

Marriage help

Learning Any Way

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Whether we are telling our brains to think and speak well of ourselves and others, and we’re rehearsing positives on purpose day in and day out {and reaping the happy benefits} or, if we are telling our brains to listen to negatives and believe negatives and speak of negatives and rehearse negatives, {and suffering the outcome of that focus}, either way we are training our minds. 

So I guess the only question to ask oneself is: in which state do I want to live my life?

I love that starting-with-the-end-in-mind idea! Decide on the consequence you want and do what it takes to get it!

Here’s to cultivating- yes, that’s a verb, and verbs mean effort- a happy, healthy mind and heart that leads to a happy, healthy you.

What a joy it is to be around people who are in love.

Love to you!

Sincerely,
Jacque

Servant Leader Loves

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We sometimes get confused. We might ask ourselves, “If I commend myself for a job well-done, am I proud?” or “If I berate myself, does that make me humble?”

I’d say, no and no.

I just finished cleaning the kitchen. It was one job in the middle of 15 others that was calling for my attention this morning. But I am on a path of “first things first” and I knew that leaving dishes behind breakfast would be unsettling and detrimental to the rest of the day. So I took myself by the hand, shut out the clamor of other projects and needs making a play for my attention, and I led myself to the sink. When I finished, I said, in my head, “good job Jacque, you focused in and got the kitchen clean. Way to go!”

Is that prideful? No, it’s coaching. It’s acknowledging a small success that I plan to build upon today. It’s self-help at it’s finest to comfort and encourage oneself.

What if I had gone into a tirade about all the things that need to be done and beat myself up for not being further ahead or taking on too much or, or, or….. Would that be helpful? Would I feel enlivened and buoyed up? No!

Funny thing is, when we live in the negatives, when we cultivate a voice of despair and discouragement or self-loathing, that awfulness oozes out onto the people we love even thought we don’t want it to! We feel lousy about ourselves and aren’t they an extension of us? We criticize as a past time. We find fault out of habit.

Servant leadership is about true humility, which is knowing who we are in relationship to God, and being willing to be led and taught by Him, which leads to being filled with His love for ourselves and others.

We can serve best when we are in His love.

We must hear and correct the way we speak to ourselves if need be, in order to be in love!

What loving words do you have for yourself right now, today? Please, please say them! You deserve words that are encouraging and positive. Find them and say them, and let them spill out to your children and your spouse!

Sending you my appreciation for the love you give every day that makes the world better for us all! Thank you!

Love,

Jacque

P.S. I would love to hear the words you come up with in the comments! Please share and inspire the Lioness community!

 

Worthy Pursuits

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Any sacrifice you are making to teach and support and nurture and strengthen your family will pay you in the end. We’re here to grow together. Even the greatest pain- childbirth, temporary separation, saying you’re sorry and asking forgiveness, finding the strength to forgive; all will be nothing compared to the joy that comes to those who love.

“(Mortals) say of some temporal suffering, ‘No future bliss can make up for it,’ not knowing that Heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory,…The Blessed will say, ‘We have never lived anywhere except in Heaven.'”

C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce

Fight for your family’s success!

Keep going.

Heaven is cheering you on! Can you hear it?

Love,
Jacque

Strength In Us

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Every family has challenges. No, every family has multiple, on-going, at times life-threatening and or soul-threatening difficulties they are trying to work through.

And, while none of us are without challenges, there is so much strength in moving through them together! 

Funny how we really come to understand the strength of togetherness, when we witness or experience the death of a relationship or family unit.

Many of you have experienced this pain and my heart goes out to you! You know what it is to be without your people; without the structure and stability that each person contributes to the whole. For instance, you understand the subtle balancing of two parents as they combine strengths and accommodate for weaknesses, so much that you don’t know who does what, they’re just singularly, mom & dad.

Yes, our bonds, so profound and complex, are worth fighting for!

In part simply because facing life together is such an extreme blessing! We can collectively work and sweat and bleed if we have to in order to make it through, knowing that we are far stronger together {yes, even when someone in that together is driving you batty!} and that, with God’s help, we can weather the storm. Together.

I thank heaven for the together that is our family. There is no greater blessing in my life.

Be strong.
Be committed.
Be fierce in defending and supporting one another.
Guard and protect your union.
The dividends of togetherness are endless.

Love,

Jacque

Those Wrong Songs

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I say “wrong” because they aren’t true, and I’m referring to the songs in our culture that worship people, even those we love.

The music that says, “If you leave me, I won’t have any reason to go on.”

Or, those that sing along the lines of, “If you decide to be unfaithful to me, it would kill me.”

I reject those messages. For those of us who put our faith and hope in God, they are wholly untrue.

Instead, I would suggest lyrics and declarations that speak of our commitment and steadiness. Of our decisions and behavior. Of the divinity of our souls and the eternal purposes of God. And of the strength that comes from putting good faith and hope in the promises and fidelity of others, with the understanding that because of humanness, we ultimately lean and depend on God and His promises to us.

If the day ever comes, or already has come, that someone you love abandons their commitment to you, or in some way is unfaithful, I hope you will determine now that you will stand in strength; find forgiveness, beauty and newness in life because of your faith in and dependence on your Heavenly Father. For ultimately, giving the responsibility of our happiness to another person is a misuse of our agent-hood.

We all make mistakes. We all fall short. Only He is worthy of all praise and adoration.

Love and blessings,

Jacque

“With God all things are possible,” even surviving, rising, discerning, forgiving and healing. God bless you!