Marriage help

Six Thrifty Hacks


Are you a thrift shopper? I didn’t know that I was until I needed shirts to wear when I was employed at a paint store. The first time I walked through racks of second-hand clothes, I have to admit I felt a little embarrassed and self-conscious. {Bear in mind, this was long before thrifting was “in” as it seems to be now.}

Since that first experience, looking for t-shirts that would become paint splattered, I have grown to love thrift-shopping and I’ve learned a lot about the art in the intervening years.

So, I thought I’d share a few things to consider if you need to stretch your family’s budget or if you just like the thrill of a hunt and a good deal!

1 Look for quality. Items from clothes to furniture are going to serve you better and longer if they are high quality. Cameras have so many clicks, fabric has so much wear, zippers have so many zips and then things wear out. It’s unfortunate if you buy something second hand and then have it wear out too quickly.

Look for quality in the weight and wear {is it already worn out?} of fabric; make sure that buttons and zippers are all there and function well; inspect things inside and out and make sure there are no damaged places beyond what you are capable and or willing to repair. I’m pretty scrappy and I often don’t mind scrubbing or polishing or sewing or sometimes even, sanding and staining or repainting, but if you’re not into doing those things, or if it would take an inordinate amount of time to get your purchase in working order, you’re probably better off leaving it at the store.

2 More is not necessarily more. Just because they have 10 of something you like doesn’t mean that it would be beneficial for you to buy and have 10 of anything! It’s easy to become a “collector” and that seems to defeat the purpose of thrifting in order to have a nice home or office or wardrobe. On occasion, you may run into something you feel is such a great item for a great price that you decide you’ll store it away until you need it, and that’s ok. But certainly be picky about what you buy, especially if you don’t have an immediate need or use for it.

3 Look for a good fit, when buying clothes. Particularly for growing kids, you don’t need to sacrifice well-fitting clothing even if they’re sporting hand-me-downs or second hand purchases. Paper boxes work well as storage containers for clothes that are too small or not fitting yet. Mark the boxes with the size and keep them in the top of a closet or under a bed. Then if you find something that is high quality and a great price, you can stash it away in the appropriate box, and have it easily accessible when you need it in the future. Or, if there are younger siblings coming up, you can find the clothes the older children have worn that have stayed clean and in good repair when you need them.

{And just a note about cleanliness– it counts! Kids of course need clean clothing, but also, they need to be clean as well. It speaks volumes to children to know that their bodies are respected and cared for. How wonderful for a child to feel the care of a parent when they respectfully wash and groom them. How wonderful for a child to greet the world with a clean face and combed hair and clean and well-fitting clothes. I don’t think our kids need to be in name brand clothing or dressed so nicely that they can’t play and have fun, but having the basics of cleanliness and clothing goes a long way in instilling confidence and self-respect in a growing mind and heart.}

4 Think flow. When you are decorating or working on a functioning wardrobe, consider taking something “out” every time or often times when you buy something “new” to keep things rotating, uncluttered and in good repair. There isn’t much that is as energy- sapping as piles of stuff that are no longer needed or no longer fits or works for whatever reason. And there isn’t much that is as energy-giving as airy spaces in rooms and closets and cupboards! It’s a heady thing, not to mention, restful. Employing some kind of rotation process means the difference between becoming a collector-of-stuff and being a super-savvy shopper.

5 Give back. Get into the habit of regularly giving to the thrift store of your choice. Take a few minutes to put an elastic band around shoes so that they stay mated; wash clothing before donating; put jewelry into ziploc bags so that they stay together and don’t get lost in bigger items; volunteer at clothing and food banks and support efforts to send goods and necessities to places where people are in need. Nothing brings perspective like participating in relief efforts for those who are less fortunate or in harms way.

6 Give thanks. Even in our leanest times, raising a family on one income, we have been abundantly blessed! Focusing on what we have {though some moments that is a real challenge isn’t it?} versus what we don’t have, makes a massive difference in how we feel about our lives. Which in turn makes a massive difference in how we treat ourselves and others and ultimately how we function in all our relationships. Also, allow yourself to appreciate and count the bounty and beauty of nature as part of your wealth!

I hope that you are feeling blessed today and that you will enjoy your home making efforts! Whatever your style or budget, being able to make a beautiful, clean and happy environment for your loved ones is a great privilege. 

Love to you,


P.S. Sometimes I write a blog in my mind throughout the day, and then when I sit down and write it out, it feels like I’ve written it before…but today I’m really not sure if I have already actually written on this topic and posted it before or not or if it’s just been simmering in my head for awhile!? If I am repeating myself, I hope you were able to get some inspiration out of this post too!

Oh and P.P.S. It’s wonderful to make a list of the items you need before you thrift shop! Know the measurements and general dimensions of the window or room or person you are trying to dress. This preparation helps you to adjust your eyes to recognize the item you need when you see it and then to be able to make an informed decision about buying it.

Also, to go along with planning, having an understanding of what styles and colors you like best makes shopping so much faster and easier, especially if you are looking through racks of clothing that are stuffed! Knowing what you and your family each prefer cuts out a lot of time trying things on or buying and then regretting your purchase!

P.P.P.S. As soon as I hit “publish” I’ll probably think of one more thing I want to say on this fun topic! But I will refrain, unless someone let’s me know they’d like to read more. {You know you’re passionate about something when you can’t stop talking….!}

Having Fun!


Do you ever find yourself waiting for the right circumstances to come along so that you

can enjoy yourself and have some fun? Waiting for a break from an average day? Waiting for a birthday or graduation or relief from some daily burden?

So what makes life fun anyway?

Is it when you feel relaxed and happy and at ease with yourself and the world? And doesn’t it include an element of humor and graciousness? And don’t all of those things come from inside, actually independent of our circumstances?

I have spent time with people who can make most any day and any activity fun…even those we call work!

Maybe then, with a quick shift in outlook (if need be), we can turn most situations into enjoyable, maybe even fun times. We can relax. We can choose to smile, and let life and its complexities come and go.

And when there are difficult moments, we can remember that when our behavior is kind, gentle, respectful and firm we will get further than venting our frustrations on others by demanding, scolding, chastising or belittling them. {And we can get back to enjoying life much faster too.}

Even if it’s a regular day, I hope you will enjoy it to the fullest!

My love and best wishes to you,



Because of You


Because of you, the world was a better place today.
There was more laughter and fun!

There was encouragement given and kindness shown.

Because of you, life was easier for someone today.
You care and you show it.
You share other’s burdens and help to lighten their load.

Because of you, someone smiled today.
It may have been a baby in your arms or the child whose tears you dried.
It may have been your spouse who felt your love when you smiled in his direction, and meant it.

Because of you, I have greater hope!
I see you in my travels, I meet you on the street and I marvel at your beauty and your strength!
You are fighting the good fight and living with grace.

Because of you, things are better than when you came.
Oh, happy, happy day!

Be well and keep on doing all the simply grand things you’re doing!
Love, love, love,


P.S. This post is for all of you, but I dedicate it to my friend Belle who was born on this day! Love you my friend, thank you for all you are teaching me. xo

Go Deep


I hope that today finds you intact, body and spirit.

This mothering business is no small investment.

Like the circadian rhythm deep in your cells; the movement of muscles circulating watery lymph-cleansing fluid; the awesome steadiness of your heart muscle moving the blood that enlivens and animates you– like these physical processes, so you are to your children.

They are tender (loud, but tender!) plants that need the nourishing soil of your presence, your light, your voice, your smile, your care. They thrive on your attention and crave it like air.

Can you give them a place to grow now that you have given them life?

Can you make the environment of you so nourished and loved that clinging to you, they will be fed by your love-liness?

Can you, in quiet and stillness, go deep inside your heart every day to intentionally plant seeds of comfort and courage and then bend your knees and water your soul with a life-giving connection to the powers of heaven?

Can you hourly speak words of creation and truth that your very cells will hear and obey? “I am grateful for this day!” “I am well and whole!”

You are the deep place where your family is growing. And even though you are giving and and extending, needing patterns of rest and recovery too, still, your expanding heart and giving hands will be graced with growth that is meant just for those who provide safe places for others.

So please turn, and look at the girl in the mirror. Calm her, love her, protect her, provide for her needs and comfort her–fill her loving cup to overflowing with the life-giving medium that has no limit in all of time and space. The Love that fills the universe is meant for you to have in abundance and to allow to flow through you to everyone you meet; especially those of your own creation! No need to conserve! There is plenty and to spare!

I declare that God’s love will help and bless you, day by day as you humbly ask to be healed of any infirmity, spirit, mind or heart or body. Ask to understand how He feels about you, then listen. And feel. And know.

With great love,


P.S. Beautiful quotes:
“Deepen…that is where your reality lies. That is how you will find your place, and how you will find your true center.”
“It is only when we are fully rooted that we are really able to move.”
Madeleine L’Engle, A Wind in the Door

No Time to Waste


Here’s a thought question for you: Is there something that is keeping you from “feeling” your life?

Just the normal, every day stuff. Do you feel glad to see your baby’s smile or have warmth flood you when you see your kids playing peacefully together? Can you feel satisfied at the end of a productive day or let yourself cry when things are sad or disappointing?

If you can, I’m so glad! If you struggle, I’d admonish you to take a look at what may be in the way.

Sometimes we don’t allow ourselves to feel because we’ve been hurt and so disappointed that we’ve wrapped ourselves in some form of insulation for protection.

Or maybe we have built a wall of busy-ness and distraction and we don’t even know that we’re living in a sort of numbing bubble.

Maybe the expectations, most likely unrealistic ones, are overwhelming and not humanly possible to reach! Then, disappointment may be a part of every day.

If you can relate to what I’m saying, would you consider taking some time to journal your thoughts and see if you can identify the issue? Then, if needed speak to a trusted friend or if necessary a trusted counselor and ask for assistance?

When you look back over your life, you will applaud your efforts to be well, because it is so very important to the functioning of your family!

When you don’t feel, you don’t connect with others, you don’t come to understand them and sadly, you don’t have the memories of those connections later.

I pray that you will work to be your healthiest self here and now. Healing is such a wonderful journey and so worth the effort!

Love to you,