Marriage help

If You Build It


If you build it, much will come!

This family building endeavor is incredibly difficult! Would you say? It really takes everything you’ve got!

That said, it is worth everything you’ve got!

It is worth the sleepless nights caring for little ones; worth the self-discipline a maturing marriage relationship demands; worth cultivating a life-long learning attitude; worth every trip to the doctor; every bill paid; every game you watch and every dance class you support.

Family is worth making tough choices about which passions to pursue, which priorities to put at the top of your list. It’s worth becoming healthier, mind body and spirit and worth giving and receiving apologies and trying again and again and again and again.

If you struggle, you’re not alone. Every relationship has it’s ups and downs. There are no exceptions.

Success comes in humbly doing your best to support, love and encourage one another.

And that success comes one day at a time.

Building means work! It also means measurable progress and a lot of joy along the way!

You can do this. One step, one meal, one story, one outing, one assignment, one nap, one discussion at a time.

Much love to you!






I am amazed many times when I am putting spam into the virtual trash bin, how disgusting and loathsome it can be. I really feel much better when it is written in a language I can’t read, then I don’t have to concentrate so hard on not reading what new filth has landed in my Lioness box. I mean, if I were actually having to touch it, I would feel the need to wash my hands, or bleach my hands afterward!

I also recently read a book about slavery. The story was real and the people were real, but written, as many stories must be, with fiction filling in the gaps of what we know. The fact that the author has walked through the house where these horrific events took place shot me with the reality of how horrific they really were! Could we imagine pulling up to that house today to see a black slave tied to the kitchen porch post being whipped for stealing a spool of thread from the person who owns her?

How tragically sad some our history is! And yet how much more tragic it is that many still live in a reality full of only objectified bodies, sexual innuendo, and enslaving the innocent! What a hollow, even hellish existence.

Wouldn’t it be nice if everything that has been created to degrade and minimize and objectify people, most often women and children, could somehow be banished from our planet? Wouldn’t that be a great relief?

But today is not that day, today is the day we have to fight. To push back against corruption. To let our voices and our anger be directed toward the preservation and protection of all people.

{If you are surprised at my use of the word anger, understand that I believe it is absolutely the correct word, and I don’t use it lightly. Modern-day abolitionist and founder of Operation Underground Railroad, Tim Ballard sheds light on one of the issues I’m referring to, that of the world wide problem of child slavery and the sex trade. These issues are the fruits of the degradation that I’m talking about. Slavery and corruption are alive and well and require our awareness and attention!}

We must step up and push back.

Here are a few ideas on how to accomplish that.

  1. We develop relationships with those who are in our stewardship. Relationships of honesty and trust.
  2. We become fierce advocates for our family’s physical, spiritual,mental and emotional health and well being. No exceptions on what is allowed in the door of our homes and what is kept out. {Of course today the door most often means the router.} If something is objectifying or devaluing of life, it’s out. Women, fight! So your kids or maybe even your husband at times might think you are over-reacting or that you are too sensitive? I believe that this is an important part of being a woman! If you feel that something isn’t right, let your voice be heard. Kindly, gently, respectfully and firmly lead out. Shine a light on the issue. How we feel about things can be a wonderful compass to the rest of the family. Not something to feel minimized about, but rather, your sensitive feelings are something to own and employ for the benefit of your family. We are called to keep things human and real.
  3. We teach every chance we get. This doesn’t mean we are preaching at people all of the time! It means we are opening up conversations and asking questions and sharing our thoughts and testimony of what is right and what is wrong. We share our stories of the things we have learned and how we came to the understanding we have. It also means that we understand that, our example, how we spend our time, what we think is funny, how we speak of others, in all these acts, we are teaching our children.
  4. We must fill ourselves up with goodness and love every day. Intentionally seek out uplifting music, literature, causes and people. Join forces with others who are fighting a good fight. Work hard but also take breaks and fill-up our proverbial cup. And even though the battle is real and fuels our swift and definite response, we understand that we are not in a state of being angry. Allowing ourselves to feel anger in response to injustice is different than being an angry person or feeling justified in behaving badly toward others, even when our cause is just. Truly, fighting the good fight does not mean becoming combative or ugly. We fight the good fight with goodness and love, and by defending the innocent. {And by sending donations to people who are prepared to fight for the just cause that we feel strongly about fighting!}                                         

 As I write this, I see ways that I want to do better. Are there things that you would like to change in your life, in your virtual viewing diet or in your general mode of operation that might clarify your position or offer greater support to those who are struggling?

I hope the “spam” you receive today will be written in a language you don’t know.

Sending great love to you!


You’re The Top!


I’m so impressed and proud of you young mama’s!

And you grand-mama’s too!

I am witnessing your amazing-ness every day!

I see you taking care of children when you are tired– oftentimes without the help of your spouse, because of work or other commitments.

I see you getting through trying physical issues, all the while remaining your mostly patient self!

I watch you pull yourself up and challenge yourself to keep going.

I sense your strength every time I’m around you.

I say a lot of silent prayers as I watch you, asking God to watch over you and to prosper you. To make your efforts count and to help you to get glimpses of the wonderful work you are doing as a wife, mother, daughter and friend.

I witness the passion you have for your family and I see you overcoming your challenges so that you will be able to give them what they need most; a physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually healthy mother and or grandmother.

In so many ways, you are blessing the world!

I am in awe, and I thank you for your pluck and perseverance, your goodness and your love.

I hope you will take good care of yourself today and tomorrow, because you are needed, and oh, you are loved!

All my best,



Love Is On It’s Way


What warms you and makes you feel loved? A cup of peppermint tea at bedtime? A warm bath?

How about a little sleepy head next to you listening to a picture book as you read? An “I love you,” and “thanks”? How about warm socks and a good book in a comfy chair? Is it seeing the laundry folded and being put away? Or the kitchen sink sparkling after a good baking soda shine?

Is it looking at the sky or noticing the birds? Is it petting a cat or playing with a curly puppy? Is it listening to an empowering song or stepping out into the night air after it rains? Is it seeing the smile of a friend when you remember her birthday or the emoji blowing a kiss coming back on a text?

I hope that whatever it is, you will receive it when it comes or create it for yourself or for someone else.

Life is a long time, but childhood is not. Please give your children the mother they deserve by treating yourself with dignity and respect. Give yourself what you need, relax and enjoy these precious days.

Everyone will be better off when you take the breaks you need to refuel and recharge.

I think you are wonderful. Keep being your amazing self!




What Are You Waiting For?


Can you remember when you were little and it was getting close to Christmastime

or your birthday? I remember that I would start thinking about the upcoming celebration more and more as it got closer. I was preoccupied at times with wondering what the present under the tree with my name on it was! Or how so and so would like the gift I got for them. That kind of anticipation turned into a kind of waiting. When everything else was measured by how many there would be until the day; how many school days left, how many piano lessons or how many chores to do.

It seems that throughout our lifetimes, we end up doing a lot of waiting. For that boy to call, for the day of the dance, for the letter of admission in the mail, for getting the braces removed, for the hair to grow out, for the morning sickness to be over, for school to start, and on and on. And we learn that the waiting does end, and more waiting begins.

So, how amazing it is to learn to be present in the waiting.

To continue to work and learn and take breaks and breathe, all while there is something coming up ahead that will change life…again.

Being present while waiting is pretty tough if the day you’re longing for has to do with feeling better again! Or being able to walk again or see someone you have missed again!

If you are in a difficult waiting moment, I pray that you’ll hang on and find whatever snatches of relief and peace you can as often as you can!

The long awaited day will come.

Be well my friend. I wish you all the lessons your waiting is bringing to you!