Self-care ideas

Ideas and inspiration about the need to care for ones self

Confident? It Shows!

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Ever notice how you get along with other people when you are ‘in your groove’?  When you’re really feeling good about yourself, do you find that you get along better with your spouse, for instance? When you’re comfortable in your own skin, it’s so much easier to laugh, to take other people lightly, to laugh at your own mistakes and move on isn’t it?

Here’s an experiment to try:

Next time you have a scuffle or even a simple misunderstanding with someone, check in with yourself and see how you were feeling before the problem arose.  What was your self-talk that day? Did you feel happy and self-assured, or were you feeling down on yourself about something?  {This seems to be particularly true in a marriage relationship!} Feeling sick or tired or hungry or grouchy or unattractive? That’s usually the time the guard goes down and the negative and critical voice takes over. Not only does it berate you, but then the thoughts will come that the current problem or situation is actually your spouses fault. Am I right?

It is absolutely astounding to me when this reality hits home.  And the astounding part is that we need to be taking far greater care of ourselves and each other if we want a peaceful family life.

That’s the bottom line.

So I ask you: How can you take better care of yourself?

And how can you then take better care of the people who are your responsibility?

Do you need to shower and dress in the morning?  Do you need to stay hydrated?  Do you need a break for a few minutes to unwind your brain once a day?  Do your children need their meals earlier?  Do they need more sleep or an earlier bedtime? Do they need better nutrition than they are currently getting?  Does your spouse need more kindness and understanding than you are currently offering him?

Jot down three answers to each question and then take 60 seconds to envision yourself doing exactly those things. And voila! You’re on your way! {Sounds as though I’ve over-simplified this, but try it!  You just may be inspired and amazed at how quickly your vision will come into being.}

I wish you more peace.

Love,

Jacque

 

Think Pioneer

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I couldn’t help taking a picture of this pioneer spice rack when I was visiting a festival over Memorial Day.  Isn’t it beautiful?

I noticed how earthy and sturdy things looked in the pioneer canopies that were set up to show old world skills.

 

I saw things made of wood and brass, crockery and copper, wicker, colored glass and cast iron.  There was no plastic in sight!  And no garbage!  Think of it; the pioneers didn’t have garbage!

 

What do you own that is high quality and made to last?  Those items can serve us for years and keep things simple. I inherited two of my Granny’s metal, wood handled measuring cups. They are so superior to any of the plastic sets I own.

How many dishes and utensils do we actually use?  How many do we actually need?  My goal is to continue to lighten my kitchen load and make things easier to care for by just having less in the drawers and cupboards.

As you are paring down and deciding what it is that you really need, think of the value of having less to care for and more time to live!

I hope the week has gotten off to a good start for you.

Lots of love coming your way!

Jacque

Lighten Your Load!

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This month’s seminar step is lighten your physical load and reap the benefits of lightening your spiritual, mental and emotional load as well!

What areas of your space need to be lightened up?

What triggers you every time you walk in the door?

What spaces are “stuck” and need to be let go so that air and light can move there again?

Inventory it!  Take a pencil and do a walk through of each room in your house.  You don’t need to figure out all of the solutions or know exactly how to tackle what needs to be done, just take the first step of opening your eyes to see how things really are.

Baby steps, baby steps…and you’re on your way to a lighter, brighter future!

Love,

Jacque

Mind Mapping

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Plutarch (46-120 A.D.) wrote, “Perseverance is more prevailing than violence; and many things which cannot be overcome when they are together yield themselves up when taken little by little.

So how are you faring with the challenge of shifting your mental conversation to a brighter, more positive one than it has been in the past?

Are you catching negativity before you sense it in your mood or your words or even in your body?

If you are, good for you!  That is progress!

 

I read an idea recently about choosing one area of your life that you usually think negatively about, and starting with a short amount of time, create a “negative-free zone” around that one topic.  So you might decide that for two minutes every hour or every morning and night or every day, you are going to consciously choose to think positively about that topic for two minutes. If this amount of time seems too difficult, pray for strength and ability!  We have to start somewhere.  And surely, if there is any battle that God would want to help us win, it is this one.  If you have the faith, call on angels to assist you!  Those may be the ones you live beside in your family or those unseen.

When you have crossed that hurdle of two minutes of peace, you can make the time a bit longer or more frequent.  As the days go by, you can eventually create a boundary that you will no longer think negatively about that subject at all.

 

Feel good?  What a relief that will be right?

After that success, you can branch out into other topics that have been plaguing your mind with down and depressing thoughts, and cut them out little by little until your positive mindset is flowing out to every topic of conversation you are having with yourself!  Wow!

What happens is nothing short of miraculous.

It’s as if a dam inside gradually let’s go, little by little and then breaks.  The places of stuck, sticky, dark and demeaning energy find their way out.  They loosen and let go and you are no longer under their influence. You have chosen, step by step, thought by thought, to banish them from you.  Truly, they were never worthy of you at all!

This process opens up new space!  Space that is free and clear and just the right fertile soil for the light and airy, sweet and satisfying thoughts and their attendant emotions and feelings to come flowing into their place with their healing and sanctifying power.

Chains fall off.  Insecurity slips away.  Confidence and humility begin to reign. {Yes, they are really companions!}

 

All this comes into being by making just one, small and simple, yet intentional change.  Laying down one small boundary, “I will not allow myself to think negatively for two minutes about ___________.”

The truth is, all real growth happens in minute and subtle ways, and every big change is just choosing small bits of light over darkness for a period of time.  And with God’s help, sometimes that time-frame is far less than we think it will be!

I offer you my love and my heartfelt appreciation for all of the good you desire and all of the miracles you are putting into motion every single day.  You care and you love and you build and you bless and you serve and you sacrifice; and that makes all the difference.

Sincerely,

Jacque

 

 

Worthy of Help

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It’s risky business being human isn’t it?

And working on making real and lasting connections with others can be tricky and a bit worrisome!

Do you find that you’re going about your life, doing pretty well and then all of a sudden you find that you need help with something? Do you freeze and feel awkward about asking for help? Does that make you feel “less than?” But then, do you hesitate to lend a helping hand or offer to help someone else? Probably not!

Well, what if you or I truly need help?  What should we do? Try to over-extend and wear ourselves out? Let things slide and try to play catch-up later? Crawl into a hole and let the thought of what needs to be done bury us until I have come to a complete halt and unable to do anything?

What do you think?

Is it ok to ask for help?  Are you somehow less of an adult, less of a woman, less of a mother, less of a wife, less of a person if you let someone know you need assistance?

 

I think the difficulty sometimes is showing vulnerability.  Or maybe it’s that we fear we may seem “needy.” Maybe it’s not wanting to feel obligated to offer help to someone else in the future or in other words, indebted to them.

A woman I heard talking about, BRAVING, or learning to make connections with others, (and I wish I written their name by the note I made to myself!), made this statement: “If we devalue ourselves for asking for help, then we will devalue others when they need help.”  (And can’t we feel it when that devaluing attitude is present when we are on the receiving end of things?)

She said that, besides asking for, or offering help, there are many things we can do to cultivate real human connections that will help us to have healthy, life-affirming connections with our friends and family.

We can continue to learn to have greater love for ourselves; greater trust in others; more ability to guard the vulnerability of others by keeping their confidences; more practice at doing what we say we will do; taking responsibility for our words, actions and mistakes and cultivate an attitude of assuming the best about our friends and their motives.

It is a lonely and insecure world when we try to live in it alone.  Heaven help us to learn, by baby steps if necessary, to love and to be loved.

My love and best wishes to you my friend.

Jacque

P.S. If you know who came up with BRAVING, please comment so that we can give them kuddos!