We sometimes get confused. We might ask ourselves, “If I commend myself for a job well-done, am I proud?” or “If I berate myself, does that make me humble?”
I’d say, no and no.
I just finished cleaning the kitchen. It was one job in the middle of 15 others that was calling for my attention this morning. But I am on a path of “first things first” and I knew that leaving dishes behind breakfast would be unsettling and detrimental to the rest of the day. So I took myself by the hand, shut out the clamor of other projects and needs making a play for my attention, and I led myself to the sink. When I finished, I said, in my head, “good job Jacque, you focused in and got the kitchen clean. Way to go!”
Is that prideful? No, it’s coaching. It’s acknowledging a small success that I plan to build upon today. It’s self-help at it’s finest to comfort and encourage oneself.
What if I had gone into a tirade about all the things that need to be done and beat myself up for not being further ahead or taking on too much or, or, or….. Would that be helpful? Would I feel enlivened and buoyed up? No!
Funny thing is, when we live in the negatives, when we cultivate a voice of despair and discouragement or self-loathing, that awfulness oozes out onto the people we love even thought we don’t want it to! We feel lousy about ourselves and aren’t they an extension of us? We criticize as a past time. We find fault out of habit.
Servant leadership is about true humility, which is knowing who we are in relationship to God, and being willing to be led and taught by Him, which leads to being filled with His love for ourselves and others.
We can serve best when we are in His love.
We must hear and correct the way we speak to ourselves if need be, in order to be in love!
What loving words do you have for yourself right now, today? Please, please say them! You deserve words that are encouraging and positive. Find them and say them, and let them spill out to your children and your spouse!
Sending you my appreciation for the love you give every day that makes the world better for us all! Thank you!
P.S. I would love to hear the words you come up with in the comments! Please share and inspire the Lioness community!