I was reading a newspaper article today about drug addiction. The writer was highlighting a young mother who was getting her life back together after spending most of her 20’s with a serious drug addiction that started after a painful surgery.

He describes the place in a large city where hundreds of arrests have been made recently for the buying and selling of illegal substances. He quotes a police detective as saying, that the war on drugs is’t doing much for the underlying problems in our society that lead to chemical dependency. He goes on to write, “Jails, prisons and medications can only offer temporary fixes. The solution is so long, and so far-reaching, and so revealing about the limitations of our culture that it’s almost hard to believe.  You’ve got to teach people to love each other and be better to each other.  If a person feels connected and safe, they will behave beautifully.”

{I think that’s what the Lundberg’s have been saying for years in their book, I Don’t Have To Make Everything All Better, right?}

It’s what we’ve been talking about in Lioness! Validation is truly the anti-drug! But in order to offer validation to our families, we have to feel it ourselves!

Help! Our society is so mixed up as to what brings validation and happiness and fulfillment and contentment.

It isn’t stuff.

It isn’t a title.

It isn’t being signed-up for more lessons and clubs and groups.

For kids (and everyone else for that matter) it is belonging somewhere. It is being with those who care about them more than they care about life itself. It is in quiet moments when someone is really listening. When children feel that they are of worth, someone really cares and their feelings matter!

And where do those things happen best?

At home.

This means that home is the center of society and ideally, we moms are in the middle of home! And so it follows that we’ve got to get our head’s in the game and guard our thoughts, our time, our attention and our aspirations. If we want a culture that is moving toward positivity and hope, we have to do the ground work. We have to give kids a safe place to be. We have to be healthy in our minds so that we can be a safe place for them. 

No, we can’t create a social program that will give children what a family can give them. That’s what the family is for!

We can’t wave a wand and have the whole world turned into a safe place for our kids.

But by our efforts to bless and encourage the children in our homes or extended families or neighborhoods or cities, our efforts will ripple out and change the world for the better!

What small changes can be made to raise your personal level of health so that you can be most effective in your parenting? Or if you are an Aunt or an Uncle or a Sister, how can you make strides in your life that will help you to contribute positively to the children in your life? And then, how can you make yourself more accessible to the children you love?

I pray that we can see through the smoke and mirrors that are designed to make us feel discontented and or missing out or lacking in wealth or prestige or opportunity or whatever the case may be. In reality, our wealth lies in good health, in growing marriages, in raising or teaching children, learning and developing our skills and talents, in serving our fellowmen and in deepening and strengthening our ties to God. And more than anything else I know of, these aspirations require focus! And dedication! And strength! And endurance! And an abundance of love!

So just for clarity’s sake, if you’re looking out there for your life, you’ll be looking your whole life.

Turn around and look at the small, or not so small, people who are depending on you. The adventures you have with them will be the grandest memories you will ever have. Make this time count.

As I write the words, ‘turn around’, it reminds me of a song that my son sang with a group in high school. To me it was more a song about mentoring and loving a child than a romantic song. Here is a listen for you. {Sorry, apparently this picture isn’t of the guys who really sang this blast from the 60’s!}

Enjoy, and way to go! You’re doing so well! Keep going in your efforts to improve things in your health and at home!





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