Today I heard someone, who has done a lot of living, speak about trust. He said that we don’t really know each other very well because most of the time we don’t allow others to see our real selves because we don’t trust them enough.  Do you trust people to the point of being able to be completely open and vulnerable and fully yourself?

The idea got me to thinking. What are the things that we habitually do that might keep our closest friends and family members from trusting us with the gift of truly knowing them?

And if emotional intimacy is the ultimate prize of human interaction, isn’t it a sad thought that so many marriages and families are devoid of real, whole-souled closeness?

Here are a few thoughts:

1 When we are critical of anyone, even ourselves, we give others the signal that they are not safe with us.

2 When we gossip, we let people know indirectly that we do not protect those that are not able, because of their absence, to defend themselves.

3 When we complain about the efforts of others, we give people the clue that eventually they may be unappreciated too.

4 When our emotions or behavior are out of our control, we are giving people a warning that we aren’t trustworthy, even to ourselves and our own best interests.

5 When we mock others, those present may slide further into themselves with a vow never to be vulnerable in our presence.

I wish that everyone in the world could have at least one person they could trust whole-heartedly with the beauty of their whole selves. And just think of the consequences of that!  I believe that our prisons and divorce courts and detention centers and drug-rehab facilities would be empty. Intimacy or connection is the great anti-drug and the antidote to possibly every human problem we have.

Maybe we can each make a tiny shift in our awareness and then in our thoughts, words and behavior that will help us to deepen and strengthen those precious relationships we have right now, by learning to trust and by becoming more trustworthy.

Godspeed!

Love,

Jacque