I used to think that women were capable multi-tasker’s.
That we could swoop into a room and accomplish ten things at a time!
And, as if we were using a magic wand, we could see the results of our powers in quick succession. Wow!
But now, I’m changing my mind.
It might be because I burn things on the stove, fairly regularly, when I think I’ll just get something warming and then go and tackle x, y, or z, but then I’m brought back to that warming thing because it has warmed so long it’s black.
Or, it might be because I can get stuck in between starting and working on ten things, but have discovered how hard it is to finish all ten of those things together!
What I do think is true is that as women, we can see multiple things that need doing all at once. And we may start this and then get to that and then move forward to another thing until we have so many projects going (even if they are each, seemingly insignificant small jobs) that we get burned out, working so hard, but often not seeing the results…because little is fully finished!
I’m learning that when I observe the many things that need doing, and I put them in a prioritized list on my planner, then I can start and finish, start and finish, start and finish and many things do get done. Really done.
Or, using my list, I can focus on four or five items each day, and get them each completed, versus, starting 10 and only finishing four. (Which “undoneness” leaves me feeling totally out of sorts!)
In contrast to us, it is true that men focus on one thing at a time. That is how their brains were created to function. So they can get themselves ready for the day and get out the door without ever seeing the dirty clothes or toothpaste splats or breakfast dishes on their way. But that’s because, taking care of all of those things wasn’t their goal! The goal was to get out the door on time. And they accomplish what they set out to do!
So, we can get in trouble in a few ways can’t we? One, if we expect ourselves to be magical, starting and finishing a slew of things all at the same time.
Or two, we can get cross-ways with our spouse when we expect him to be noticing and responding to multiple things at once too! (No, he’s not a flawed woman, he’s a fully functioning man!)
Mantra: We see many. He sees one.
We need lists (to start and finish things) and he needs appreciation for his direct and manly way of being in the world which often means getting the family from A to B in a timely way!
I hope you’ll enjoy and support yourself in the delightful and multifaceted way your feminine mind works. And that you’ll accept and honor the clear and direct way your spouse thinks. Together, in harmony, we create beautiful balance.
Love to you today!
“The mission of Lioness at the Door is to uplift, strengthen and encourage women of all ages to magnify health, hope and happiness at home. We do so boldly, with humility and gratitude for the opportunity.”
This was enlightening
That was my hope! Thanks Carlin! xoxo
Jacque, did we talk about this fascinating topic in our last phone conversation? I’ve just blogged about it too. Here’s a link. I’d love to hear more about what you’re discovering in this fascinating new perspective on understanding differences between women and men.
https://myfeelgoodfoods.com/3-secrets-to-understanding-men-and-expanding-your-peace/
XOX,
What a great post Jonell! You are a talented writer! No, I don’t think we talked about it, but doesn’t it make all the difference to know a little about the differences between how our minds work?! xo