I have a friend who is struggling mightily to find purpose and meaning in existence, and to discover anything that will trump their thoughts of anxiety and worry in day to day life.

It’s a massive struggle and, it’s also challenging to watch!

Mostly because there is a way out, but it has to be chosen, and no one else can do the choosing!

You might say that a world that consists of a universe with one person in the middle is the definition of misery.


Photo by Jeremy Thomas on Unsplash

It’s a spiral turning, ever turning, inward and downward, becoming isolation itself.

I’ve been through segments of time like this, so I have great empathy for those who currently looking for a key to the door!

As we evolve through our challenges and come to see evidences of the grit inside us that refuses to give up! And we come to recognize one liberating key to change is redirecting the spinning, inward, self-absorptive thoughts, and start spinning our attention outward! Out toward anyone and everyone around us. Those who need our care and concern; those who are desperate for a hand to hold; those who have made mistakes or who are sick. {Guess that includes all of us.}

{Note: Lest any of us are tempted at this point to start thinking that self-care is self-centered, I offer this reminder: we care for ourselves in part because we behave in ways that are loving toward ourselves and others, and because we know that the preparation of self-care enables us to give.}

What a relief it becomes to stop being a proverbial black hole and start adding to the collective good. But what does it cost?

It costs our being replaced in the picture. We aren’t the center, {thank heaven!} we are, gratefully, one of many beloved children who need each other.

It costs our prayers as we tune into the Spirit of God to learn what needs to happen next and where we might be most useful each day.

It costs our effort. Not only working to see the needs of those around us but also the energy to reach out in strength and offer support.

It costs being willing to initiate the process of building relationships and connections, which might feel risky or be out of our comfort– but which can lead to the give and take of healthy interdependence!

It costs our pride, since we don’t know the why’s of anyone’s situation and can’t begin to judge. “There, but for the grace of God, go I!”

It costs our life-long devotion to the cause of building people and furthering causes that alleviate suffering and despair.

But the reward is worth it!

Not only are we rescued from our own neediness, but we are given a chance to become part of something truly Good and so much bigger than ourselves.

The ticket for us to get on the train of peace and progress is bought and paid for. But we do have to let go of fear and the distracting and self-absorptive past-times we’ve created in order to take the ride.

I wish you joy. Great joy, as you are about ministering to those within your sphere of influence.

With love,

“The mission of Lioness at the Door is to uplift, strengthen and encourage women of all ages to magnify health, hope and happiness at home. We do so boldly, with humility and gratitude for the opportunity.”