Ever notice the simple truth that men and women are very, very different?

Isn’t it funny that that’s a no-brainer question and you might think I’m being funny, but in society’s quest for reaching some kind of realm where we are all the same, sometimes this blatant fact gets over looked or kicked under the proverbial rug.

We are different. We are vastly different and we need to be in order to make the whole that our two halves make.

So to point out a few things about women that we get stuck on if we are trying to be like men:

We are softer. We have different hormones that make us that way. Yes, there are the few sculpted, young, tanned and toned female bodies that are posted everywhere we look so that we can compare ourselves and come up short, and somehow think that we are flawed and need to hide. But those bodies don’t look like anyone I know. And I have beautiful friends! They just don’t look like they’ve been through body-building boot camp. They look like women who are healthy and active but not with buns or anything of steel. {Can I say that?}

We are more susceptible to the effects of stress. Nope, we aren’t robots, nor are we like the “women” in movies who carry machine guns while wearing seductive red leather…whatevers. You know who I mean? The newish heroines who are as tough and crass as the men but still have to be sexually alluring? {What is that about?} We don’t zoom here and there and hire and fire people with no emotion and order the world around or go through separation and loneliness without visible, sometimes crushing effects. Our hormonal balance tips when we get over-done. It lets our bodies know that it’s not a good time to conceive, since there’s already so much commotion going on we might not be able to carry and nurture another life.

We need the care and nurture of other women. Our mothers and sisters and daughters and friends are very important to our health! We need connections and talking and support and friendship in order to be well. We also need breaks! We multi-task like nobody’s business and then need to disengage from the intensity and have a good laugh or sometimes a good cry and oftentimes both!

So my friends, particularly my young friends, if you are feeling that you need to be going at break-neck speed to have the body of Hollywood’s dreams, or fame or recognition or all of the accomplishments that you want, right now, please know that your speed will eventually be more hurtful than helpful. Cortisol {that notorious stress hormone} thrives on you thinking that you need have it and be it all now! It will keep you from losing that weight. It will keep your hormones in disarray. It will age you and depress you and leave your husband wondering what has happened to the wonderful girl he married.

Our nurturing nature requires us to be present in order to be effective. That means that when we are relaxed and enjoying ourselves we are far more nurturing than when we are uptight and thinking about something else! {Sigh. I so wish I could snap myself back in time to try again knowing that is the goal instead of trying to find validation in doing too much!} I hope you can benefit from knowing that you were designed to foster connections and that you will be far more effective when you do what it takes to pamper yourself and calm yourself and create in yourself a warm and sunny place that will renew you and keep you fresh as much as possible.

Be well. It’s pretty important to those you love.

Love,

Jacque

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