Who is in charge at your house?
That seems like a quirky question I know, but really, who calls the shots?
I’ve been reminded several times in the last few days that a parent’s role is so critical that it can’t be part of a popularity contest!
Do we want our children to like us? Sure! Do we want them to be happy and have good things come their way? Of course!
But, if we’re so worried about rocking their boat, so-to-speak, that we habitually hesitate to offer course corrections or let them wade through the consequences of their choices, especially when they are difficult, we are doing them a great disservice.
Yep, there might be other people that can have casual, light and fun relationships with our kids, but they aren’t in the parenting role. We are.
Sure, kids can benefit greatly from friends and coaches and mentors and extended family members and that’s awesome! But let’s not get misguided in thinking that we want to be liked and have life be fun and smooth so much that we don’t step in and parent our kids.
I am overjoyed {often!} as I observe parents who are supportive and clear. Tough and tender. When they are willing to deal with a child who is temporarily upset by needing to deal with correction and consequences. You are doing an amazing work! I salute you!
Our children are depending on us to be kind, gentle, respectful and firm. {Do you know which one of those words is most difficult for you to “do”? I do and I’m working on it!} I’m convinced that our children’s welfare is the most motivating reason out there for us to grow-up ourselves and take responsibility for our own words, actions and basic behavior! They need us to be adults, so we need to do whatever it takes to move forward.
Best wishes to you as you practice, practice and practice some more. I’ve been parenting for 30 years and I am still practicing!
Don’t quit! Just take it a day at a time and you’ll become, over time, the solid, happy parent you can envision yourself being.
Love to you today my friend,
Jacque
P.S. Being a Lioness at the Door of you home is much easier when you are taking breaks, feeding yourself good food and keeping things as simple as possible. It takes solid self-care to make a solid parent! Bless you for your efforts!