I heard recently that there is a new push, to help parents, particularly mothers, to stop wondering what is wrong with them when they get burned out and can’t run as fast as they think they should, when often, they simply aren’t getting the rest they need and have expectations that would kill a seasoned athlete.

So may I kindly suggest that if you’re going to bed consistently after 10:00-10:30 you’re not getting enough sleep?

There may not be anything wrong with you, maybe you’re just not renewing at night.  Is this a revelation?  Do you go to bed late and have headaches during the day?  Or do you live on 4-5 hours of sleep and think you should be able to feel consistently energetic and run marathons and generally keep up with everyone you compare yourself to?

Friends, self-care habits are a big, big, big deal!  Unless you are an out-lying statistical phenomenon, and function beautifully on four hours of sleep, you’d better shift things up and go to bed earlier if you are struggling with ill health, mental, emotional, spiritual or physical.

Amazingly, for a young mother, sleep is the most coveted commodity, isn’t it?  Then why give it up so easily for something as un-self-care-ish as watching depressing news or scrolling through Facebook or playing a digital game or whatever other time-killing pursuits there are?

As always, if you are noticing that you aren’t functioning well in some way, go back to the basics and see if your life has gotten out of balance in some way.  Ask the difficult, but oh-so-obvious questions:

Am I getting enough sleep? (Shoot for 8 hours! Sorry you nursing moms, the day will come!)

Am I drinking enough water? (For sure when you are thirsty, but shoot for 8 glasses)

Am I eating real food at regular intervals throughout the day?

Am I getting some form of exercise on a daily basis, wether it’s mopping a floor, climbing stairs, walking the dog, pushing a stroller, etc.  (Does NOT need to be in a gym!)

Am I making time for my mind to be quiet? (Meditation and prayer)

Chances are, when these questions can be answered affirmatively, you’ll find that you are feeling pretty well.  Of course there are times when a malfunction occurs and simple re-balancing is not enough.  But in general, we are quite resilient, when our needs are being accknowledged and met.

Oh, and may I add one more suggestion? If you are not making time to be alone with your spouse to enjoy a fulfilling intimate life together, I would highly recommend that you put that on your high priority list and plan for it!  Rest during the day if needs be, don’t over schedule yourself, take time to pamper yourself and then pamper him!  Sex, in a committed long-term relationship is extremely healthy for you in every way possible.  And wow, does it help to make life sweet.

I hope you will take extremely good care of yourself today!

Love,

Jacque

P. S. Another question to ask would be if you may need to recruit some help if you are fighting with some kind of anxiety that is making everything far more difficult than it needs to be.  There are so many helping hands and listening ears out there! If you need it, don’t hesitate to find it.  I have been there and I am so grateful to the professionals who have helped me to unravel those difficult, looping feelings.  My mantra, when I would feel the anxiety starting to rise, became, “Don’t stay there!” And I hope you won’t stay there either. Be well.