Want to take the quality of your marriage up a few notches? Want to have a stand-out, “wow-they-look-happy” relationship?
Listen up!
This advice comes after 31 years of marriage, and I am staggered with gratitude to say that it is a great marriage! That must mean we’ve learned something!
Many of these ideas I have learned the hard way, so I hope you will skip some of that learning curve and just take my word for it!
1 Smile at your man. Think every happy thought you have in you and then give him your kindest looks of admiration and gratitude. Do this as often as you humanly find possible.
2 Offer words of admiration. Tell him the ways you love him and the ways you admire what he does, who he is, how he looks, how he sounds, how he cares. Take a few minutes to consider all these different facets of your mate, make a mental list and have it ever ready.
3 Shower him with affection. Hold his hand, stroke his cheek, rub his back, kiss him hello, kiss him goodbye, and whole-heartedly enjoy your intimate life together. What a bonding and beautiful gift!
4 Offer gratitude. Every day that you are together, offer your thanks for every thing he does for you and for your family. Small, large or in between, be on the lookout for the ways that your spouse shows his love and offers his leadership. The more you notice and communicate your appreciation, the more caring and compassionate he will be.
Now, if you happen to be thinking something like, women shouldn’t have to do all of these things to stroke a man’s ego or, I don’t like x, y, or z about my husband so I can’t do these steps, think again.
I have mentioned some of the things that men appreciate most, which is, well, mostly being appreciated! And our intentionality in meeting this need doesn’t have anything to do with being manipulative or false.
This list is a sampling of how a feminine human being can build up and fortify her masculine human being spouse in ways that are important to masculine human beings. That’s all.
Women, statistically, want many of these same things, and do we feel badly for one second for believing that we deserve them? To be appreciated and noticed and shown affection? No! Then it shouldn’t be hard to understand that our spouse would like the same considerations. He’s human too.
I promise that if you employ more of these amazingly simple habits to show your spouse that you care about him and about your relationship, you will reap the benefits for a lifetime.
Take the focus off of you and what you want and feel you have earned, and put your focus on him and on what you can do to strengthen and sustain your relationship. Not only will you be in a powerful position to make things better, but it will be a relief to take yourself out of the center of the equation. It is exhausting to run around trying to say all of the ways you want him to behave toward you! I know all about it! Besides that, it doesn’t work! He’ll figure it out sooner, if he hasn’t already, by being the recipient of your generous and loving attitude toward him.
If I could boil down the motto for our 32nd year together it might be,”You spoil me (in a big way!) and man, do I love to spoil you!”
I wish you many years of sweet and companionable, dynamic and blissful companionship!
Love,
Jacque
This photo was taken on the day our first grandchild was blessed. I was in the middle of a health challenge and a little loopy on pain-killers. My husband carried me out to be a part of the pictures, and then carried me back to our room. I cherish this picture for many reasons, but one is that he carried me through, figuratively and literally that day.