Hello my friend.
I hope this post finds you well today.
I have a little parable to share, one that I witnessed recently that feels like a prime way to clarify an unconditional love principle.
A few weeks ago, a dear friend of mine made an innocent mistake.
I happened to be close by when it happened, so I got to see this play out first hand.
First though, you have to know that my friend is a master at learning and remembering people’s names! He has spent a great deal of time and made conscientious efforts throughout his life to get to know people, where they’re from and most importantly learn their names.
So this particular moment was just a fluke! My friend walked into a meeting, greeted a friend, and called him by the wrong name. I didn’t hear their exchange at that moment, but I did hear about it as my friend recognized his error and lamented it!
Of course there was some embarrassment but mostly the hope was that his friend would be ok, and not feel offended at what truly was a momentary glitch.
Then I heard the apology. I watched the man’s face as he received it, and I couldn’t see a trace of confusion nor a hint of hurt or offense in his expression as he pardoned the mistake. Absolutely none.
I was grateful, even as a bystander, that the exchange was understood and that grace was offered for the simple, momentary failing of one human being communicating with another.
So what do you think this experience says about the person who got someone’s name wrong? Do you think the mistake was pardonable? I surely hope so since I make mistakes myself all the time! Can you relate?
And, what do you think this exchange says about the person who expected to be greeted by his name only wasn’t but then didn’t take someone else’s possibly fatigued thinking personally? Seems to me that he was pretty solid and not in the habit of making other people’s human frailty a personal affront!
We have all been both of these people haven’t we?
The part that I want to get crystal clear in my mind is this:
I am responsible for how I respond to the mistakes of others. I’m also responsible for my own mistakes and how I treat people, no matter if I’m tired or hungry or stressed.
And the job I’m responsible to do that makes that possible, is caring for my needs and filling my love tank each day by connecting with God and with my wise family and friends who tell me the truth!
That is my #1 job!
And the more I know that, the more I am careful about not allowing myself to become needy to the point of responding with irritation or anger, or taking offense!
But since we’re often stretched to our limits in family life, thank heaven we believe in repentance, as I witnessed my friend owning his mistake and sincerely asking for pardon. (We’ll never adjust our accounts on our own to equal perfection!)
I also witnessed pardon freely given, while knowing that it was the state of that individual, the level of love and fullness in his soul, that made the pardon possible and maybe easy to give.
What if he had been empty? With that deficiency, he may have been tempted to respond by twisting the mistake of another to justify blaming them for his own empty, lonely, lack-of-feeling-loved state.
In order to move forward, we have to get clear about accountability and the gift it is to act as the agents of our lives. We have to reclaim our power, not giving it away to the frailties of ourselves and others.
I wish you a beautiful week ahead, recognizing more and more the evidence of the love of God for you and for me, personified in the gift of His Son.
I wish you peace.
Love,